So you know I’m laughing as I type this, right? Oh yeah, I’m literally laughing my ass off over this one. According to Ancestry.com, extensive research has concluded that president Obama is linked by blood, to the very first African enslaved for life here in America back in 1640, as punishment for attempting to escape slavery. And why do I find this funny? Because Karma is a bitch that loves to aggravate the racist tendencies of white folks in America. So why do I say that? Because the funny thing about this, is that the link to Obama comes from his mother’s side of the family.
This from Ancestery.com:
We explored thousands of historical documents in our research and discovered that John Punch, the first African enslaved for life in America, was the 11th great-grandfather of President Barack Obama.
You can read the entire report yourself here (PDF). According to the press release, Ancestry.com genealogists have linked Barack Obama to John Punch, an indentured servant who went on to have children with a white woman, who eventually produced Obama’s mother, Stanley Ann Dunham’s lineage (read here). And, according to the find, this would make president Obama, the great-grandson of a slave, John Punch. Punch’s descendants inherited their free status from their mother, and went on to be free, and successful land owners in Virginia (read).
So again, why is this funny? Because here I was all this time of the opinion that the racial animus displayed towards Obama, came from the fact that he descended from one of the many Africans who escaped slavery, only to rise to become the leader of the free world. But, this is extremely hilarious to me because now we know, that the white blood that flows through his veins — the blood that “certain people” take comfort in reminding me about when he’s mentioned as the first black president — is also tainted with Negro DNA. Yep, remember that whole one drop rule thingy?
Now isn’t that funny? No seriously, this news is hilarious; however, I imagine for many of you reading this, it isn’t. But you know what? This all goes to show that we’re all one race and we’re all truly connected, and descended from the African continent. So to all you angry racists who doubt the legitimacy of Obama’s presidency, or whether he’s even an American: be careful what you wish for, if you shake your family tree hard enough, a black person from Kenya might fall out. Yep, we can’t all have Native American blood running through our veins as some of us would like to think we have.
Still need to see a birth certificate?