You know it’s really hard to believe that it is already the middle of March; damn, where did the last couple of months go? The next thing you know Christmas is gonna be on us all over again. Speaking of which, you know if we all pulled together and pitched in I’m sure we could buy Rush Limbaugh a Toyota Prius for Christmas. Yeah, just a thought, folks. And speaking of religious themed holidays and thoughtfullness. Check out what the Easter Bunny has been up to in Michigan these days:
AUBURN HILLS – A number of African-American families in Auburn Hills, Mich., said they found racist messages inside plastic eggs left in their yards.

WDIV said the incident is under investigation by police.Damn, what ever happened to the good old days when toilet papered a house, throw eggs at it, or burn a cross on the front lawn? Something tells me that somebody in Michigan at least, is taking this “Jesus was a black man,” thing too seriously. Yep, especially when they killed him on a cross some 2000yrs ago, only to wake up three days later and eventually become the president of the United States. But then again, he was handing out money to Negroes in Detroit not too long ago….

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My favorite Christmas song (on the radio) is a classic. Come to think of it, they’re all classics. But my favorite song every year is “Feliz Navidad”. I don’t know who sings it but I know its done by a Mexican dude. A pretty nice Mexican dude I might add. Hell, he saw it fit to sing and record the song in part Spanish and part English — he was probably really trynna get a green card when he did that. For a long time I didn’t know what Feliz Navidad meant. Actually, every time I heard it, I thought he was saying…”RELEASE NAVIDAD”.Yup, I thought it was a song about a locked up Mexican dude named Navidad. I thought it was pretty cool how the dude who sung it remembered his friend at Christmas. Not many people think about people in jail at Christmas time, so I thought this song was cool as hell. I mean, he wanted his friend released from jail for Christmas, and I’m sure everybody in jail around Christmas time wishes they were at home with their families. A few years ago at work this lady actually told me what the words of the song really meant. But, I still hold on to the idea of Navidad being released for Christmas every time I hear it.You’d think by now, since Christmas is like 2000yrs old (at least) somebody would invent some new Christmas songs. New lyrics instead of the same old stuff we hear every year. If that happened, it would make for an interesting Christmas radio season. Actually, they should do that and have like a Grammy Award category for just Christmas music. That alone should motivate a few artists out there. Hell, they’d all be dropping Christmas albums with all new material, instead of the same old bullshit.
Every year, some loser artist makes a Christmas album, and I often wonder who buys that crap (yeah Brian McKnight, what the fuck?!). I mean, duh, we already know the songs, and there’s only so many ways that they can change it up anyway! Lets be real, its not like its the Star Spangled Banner ya know. That’s the only song thats everybody knows that has a Puff Daddy remix. If the Grammy’s had a Christmas category that crap would stop, and we’d have new Christmas music every year, and we’d be happy instead of irritated by the idiot in the office who walks around singing the same songs and spreading holiday cheer. However, I doubt that would ever happen. Instead, we’re stuck with life as we know it in the office with stupid, repetitive Christmas songs. I’m just glad that Santa Clause doesn’t “Superman Dat Hoe”. I’d have to kill myself if that happened.Merry Christmas folks

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I think today is a holiday. I’m not sure, hell I don’t work at a bank, but I think its Columbus day or some bullshit like that. All I know is, the fuckin bank is not open, and the kids are out of school today. Today celebrates Christopher Columbus’ discovery of America. How significant is that? Its pretty fuckin significant! If Columbus chose to be a pimp and focus on making money off of some chicks instead of being a sailor, there would be no McDonalds and hence the Egg McMuffin which I love dearly. That’s how significant this shit is people! I don’t know if you’ve ever thought about it, but where would we be without Columbus? Think about that for a second. White people would still be living in Europe, Native Americans or the indigenous people of the new world would still be alive and well, and black people would still be listening to Tupac while driving Cadillac Escalades on 28 inch rims in Africa. Yup, things would’ve definitely been different for everybody.

Have you ever gave thought to why Columbus did what he did? In grade school they taught us that he did it because he wanted to eat curry chicken so he decided to go to India which was on the eastside; you know, over in the hood where Habib has that corner store next to the half a chicken and fired rice shack? But instead his OnStar wasn’t working so he made a wrong turn and ended up kickin it with some people who ate corn. He had to be pissed after that! That would probably explain why white people had beef with Sitting Bull. Hell, I get mad when I go to my fridge for Kool Aid but can’t have any because somebody left a fuckin empty pitcher in there, so I know Columbus was pissedoff when he got to his destination! And that my friend explains all the death and destruction, diseases, slavery, taxes and Soulja Boy that we have to suffer with today. Here it is hundreds of years later, and we’re still catching hell because Christopher Columbus wanted to eat curry chicken. Come to think of it, that’s probably why all the people of East Indian decent own and run all the motels in America.
Check out this video…

Aren’t you glad that you stopped by? Now you can run out and tell all of your friends that thanks to me and your grade school teacher you now understand why Columbus Day is celebrated. Hopefully now you can understand that society as we know it was no accident. Columbus didn’t set out to prove that the world wasn’t flat. He did it because he wanted to eat curry chicken. And because of him, the bank isn’t open, and you have to worry about your kids burning down the house because they’re out of fuckin school today!
Thanks Chris

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