I never realized what assimilation was or is. I never gave a thought about genocide or Manifest Destiny and I thought the holocaust only pertained to what Hitler did to the Jewish people. And it didn’t matter to me, because I never gave a thought about it. I was busy living life as I knew how, a Lakota woman. I was raised in our traditional ways but never taught all those things until I was older. I just thought life was about being traditional, with our ceremonies, songs, traditions, and ways. Sure, I went to a Christian church with my friends, went to Vacation Bible School for a popsicle, and I tested out other religions as if dipping my toes in cold lake water, but I never felt right about it. I didn’t feel wrong about it, I just felt as if it wasn’t my thing. And I made my way back to who I was and who I knew myself and my people to be. Lakota. That is where I belonged and where I feel centered.

The first time I realized that a child raised without their culture and forced into another way of life develops a huge hole in their soul was in college. I read an essay by a Vietnamese American student. She was adopted as a baby, from Vietnam, by white parents here in America. She was given a good life, she was raised with little blonde brothers and sisters and she had a suburban sounding name like Caitlyn or something. She did everything right and everything she was supposed to do in life, plus she won a scholarship to a college away from her family. It was her first time on her own and she discovered herself questioning who she was. She was drawn to other Asians and began hanging out with them. She learned of their likes, dislikes, cultures, foods, and she felt “at home and at peace.” Many of them were also adoptees, taken from their families and countries and grew up American. They were drawn to each other to fill a need in their souls. Yet she felt this with a great deal of guilt towards her American family. She loved her adopted family but felt at home, finally, with her friends, who in turn felt the same.

That is the first time I realized how taking the culture away from someone can be somewhat traumatic or really traumatic. How lost it makes that person feel. As I grew older and started seeing cases of this same thing happening with my own Native people and it was shocking. I remember the first time, was when I met a lady in her twenties. I saw her at the casino we both worked at and asked her what tribe she was from. She became angry and said “The lady that gave birth to me was from so and so reservation but I’m white. I grew up white. I was raised white, so don’t ever ask me that again.”

All I could say was “Whoa.” I stood there shocked. I never in my life met another Indian who hated being Indian, and she had to nerve to say she was white, when she was a few shades from midnight? That’s when someone told me she was raised in a foster home, who eventually adopted her.

I began then to understand what it meant to be assimilated and colonized. I began reading of our history and how children were taken by the US government from Native families once they were put on reservations. Children were forcefully taken out of their homes at the age of 5 and put in residential schools until the age of 18. They made handcuffs so small to detain these children. They were beaten for speaking their language, hair was cut, and all for the purpose of “Kill The Indian, Save The Man.”

This generation was our grandparents and great grandparents, who suffered physical, sexual,and emotional abuse in the residential schools. They were never given the chance to heal because these stories were never told. They were kept on the down low by the Catholic church and the government who ran the residential schools. Many of these boarding schools who are now in operation are now making monetary payments, now wanting to hear the stories of abuse and now trying to make amends. After a few were hit with class action lawsuits.

The next generations, also suffered and still suffer. By the foster care systems. Children were taken from their homes and given to white foster families to raise. The families receiving funding for every foster child, would often take on many foster children. The state holds the households they take the children from to the standards set by white society. Without ever listening to how we set family structures, how we take care of our own, or how we live with our traditions, they set everything up to fit a mold, that they live by.

Based on a 1976 study by the Association on American Indian Affairs found that 25 to 35% of all Indian children were being placed in out-of-home care. (Eighty-five percent of those children were being placed in non-Indian homes or institutions.) Congress then passed the Indian Child Welfare Act (25 U.S.C. § 1901) in 1978 in order to keep American Indian Children with American Indian families.

However, this is not being followed in South Dakota. Why? Because South Dakota has a dirty little secret. According to a wonderful and very thorough investigation by National Public Radio that inspired me to find my brother who was lost for 21 years due to failure of the fact that DSS didn’t follow ICWA regulations and place him with family. I was 19 years old when he was taken from his mother. I was employed and had my own place and he was 8 years old. When I asked them why they didn’t ask me, all they said was sorry and also ,sorry we can’t help you find him now. That is when I began to search for him and I also began to investigate why so many of our Indian children in South Dakota are taken from their homes and placed in Non-Native homes, this is when I found their dirty little secret.

South Dakota’s Department of Social Services receives money for Native children they take custody of. They receive more money than the non-Native children they take from their homes. Native children in South Dakota make up 15% of all the children of South Dakota, yet over half the children placed in foster care are Native. And only 13% of those children are placed in Native foster homes. While Native foster home sit empty for months. South Dakota removes children from their homes at a rate 3 time higher than any other state. But according to state figures, less than 12 percent of the children in foster care in South Dakota have been actually physically or sexually abused in their own homes. That’s less than the national average.

I still didn’t get to the dirty little secret yet. South Dakota, years ago, designated all Native children as “special needs.” Which means every Indian child in every school benefits that school with more funding and it also means that every Indian child taken from their home by DSS benefits South Dakota more than non-Native children. And although the state says they match all the money coming in from the feds dollar for dollar, the match is not exact. According

to records from 2010, the feds reimbursed the state three quarters for what it spent on the children they removed from their homes. There is also an adoption incentive program nobody hears about. The federal government gives the states $4,000 for each child who is placed into adoption from foster care. That amount is $12,000 for “special needs” children. And of course over half the children removed from homes in South Dakota are Indian children, who, you guessed it, are designated by the state as “special needs” just for being American Indian. The state has made almost a million dollars in the last ten years off of our most precious resource. Our children. They moved us to dry, barren lands that cannot be farmed, the took the gold and every resource from the lands they stole. And now they are after our children.

Why is this not making a splash? Why is it not news? Especially , in South Dakota? Because they will go to any length to cover up what they do to take our children away. Even as our children are being violated in the homes they are placed in. Here is one case that will blow anyone’s mind and still has yet to reach the media in South Dakota.

Former assistant state attorney Brandon Taliaferro and court appointed child advocate Shirley Schwab go to trial tomorrow, January 7, 2013 for crimes they didn’t commit. Mr. Taliaferro and Ms. Schwab have been indicted by SD Attorney General Martin Jackley with witness tampering and disclosure of confidential, Department of Social Services information. They are being accused of these crimes for encouraging two teenage Lakota foster girls to tell the truth about being molested by their non-Native foster parent, who is now serving a 15 year prison sentence for rape of a child under 10.

According to the Daily Kos: Mr. Taliaferro and Ms. Schwab now assert that South Dakota is engaged in a criminal conspiracy to discriminate against Lakota foster children and their mothers, fathers, grandparents and relatives. “It is financially beneficial for the DSS to remove American Indian children from their homes and place them in [white] foster homes,” said Attorney Taliaferro to the Aberdeen News on December 19, 2011. “[Had I followed] the orders of [my boss with respect to the Mette investigation, it] would have required [me] to violate the law, and ethical rules that govern attorney conduct.” Mr. Taliaferro asserts that in 2011 he refused to participate in “a cover-up of misconduct” by the DSS.

The charges are believed to be a direct response to Mr. Taliaferro and Ms. Scwab for criticizing the state’s payroll during the NPR investigation. According to reporter Stephanie Woodard in her article for 100 Reporters “Rough Justice In Indian Child Welfare” where two state Department of Criminal Investigation agents are seen on a Youtube video planning the cover-up by the state against Mr. Taliaferro and Ms. Schwab. They are unaware, that though they are off camera, they left their microphones on.

This is all dirty, low down, Gestapo like tactics used by the Department of Social Services . And it shows how far the state will bend, how low they will go, to keep the millions of dollars they have coming in by stealing yet again from the Indigenous people of this land. Instead they don’t take from the land, they take from the womb.

They won’t get away with this much longer. Something has to be done.

The post South Dakota Rape Cover-Up Case of Lakota Foster Children Ignored appeared first on Madness & Reality.

Yes, you read that right: A man used the Bible to threaten a woman with rape at a Gay Pride Parade in Michigan.

I realize I haven’t said anything about the Chick-Fil-A anti-gay marriage turned pro-gay marriage controversy in recent weeks. And to be honest, I’m not going to say anything about it; frankly, I don’t give a rats ass. I mean, it’s not like anyone who has spent time on this blog doesn’t know that I’m a secularist, and supportive of gay marriage. That said, without bringing up old arguments, there’s very little anyone can say to me from a Biblical perspective to convince me that being gay and wanting or advocating same-sex marriage is morally wrong. Besides, the Constitution protects freedom of religion and expression as well as the right to peaceably assemble and seek redress from government.

That said, the CEO of Chick-Fil-A was within his right to express his opinion of same-sex marriage, and use his religious faith as the basis for said opinion. Also, activists are also within their right to protest said establishment even as silly as it may sound to some. They can have all the kiss-ins they desire just as long as it doesn’t lead to lewd and lascivious behavior, which is totally against the law. Advocate for gay marriage and protest Chick-Fil-A all you want, but you won’t be having sex in public to show said support. As I see it, advocating for gay marriage isn’t a problem. However, it is the people hiding behind the Bible to justify their bigotry that are. Case in pint, check out what happened at a Gay Pride rally in Grand Rapids, Michigan recently.

Apparently, the Bible justifies raping lesbians:

Police in Grand Rapids, Michigan say that there was nothing they could do after Bible-preaching protesters threatened to rape and murder pro-LGBT activists at a “Gay Day” event over the weekend.

In a video posted to YouTube, several protesters with Bibles can be seen shouting at a woman celebrating in the inaugural “Gay Day” celebration, an event organized by the human rights group Tolerance, Equality and Awareness Movement (TEAM) to showcase the community’s diversity.

“Back in the day there was no free power, there was no going to the mall,” one protester tells the woman. “There was, ‘sit your ass in this house until I bring my ass home.’”

“And if your ass get to going out there like you said, guess what?” a second protester adds. “You get raped. And that’s what’s going to happen to you. … Keep your pussy clean, that’s all you need to do. Do you understand?”

After one man claims, “the Lord said that,” the woman challenges him to find the corresponding Bible verse.

He responds with Isaiah 13: “Their children also shall be dashed to pieces before their eyes; their houses shall be spoiled, and their wives ravished.”

“What does ‘ravished’ mean? It means, we going to rape your ass,” the protester explains. “And I’m going to have fun doing that shit. And you going to like that. I promise you.”

After briefly arguing that he is misinterpreting the Bible, the woman observes, “Anything I say, you say it doesn’t matter.”

“It’s going to matter right now,” the man shoots back. “It’s going to matter when your clothes off and I’m going inside of you repeatedly. That’s when it’s going to matter. Because you going to enjoy yourself.”

Mr. Unidentified Bible-Thumping Would-Be Rapist

The woman in the video told WWMT that the men also recited her boyfriend’s license plate number and promised to find and kill him. She said she called 911, but the Grand Rapids Police Department officer told her that there was nothing he could do.

Lt. Mark Ostapowicz explained to MLive.com that the report was closed because no one came forward with a specific complaint.

“The Gay Day celebration group was upset that the Bible group was able to protest, but in their protest they weren’t doing anything wrong, according to the (responding police officer’s) report,” Ostapowicz said. ““When the officers got there they were not threatening each other. As long as they’re not breaking any of the protest rules, there’s nothing we can do.”

“As of right now, we just have two groups in disagreement with each other. Nothing happened that led the officers to do more.”

In a letter posted to their website on Tuesday, TEAM called on authorities to take action to protect the LGBT community.

“It is our position that these actions should not be tolerated in this community, and that the perpetrators of such actions be brought to justice,” TEAM president Chris Surfus wrote in the letter. “[H]ate speech that incites violence, rape and other criminal actions is not constitutionally protected.”

“It is our hope that the Grand Rapids Police Department will formally charge these men for these atrocious and unwelcome actions in our community,” he added.

WWMT reported that the men were part of a Christian black supremacist group called the Black Hebrew Israelites. According to the South Poverty Law Center, the quickly spreading movement preaches “a frightening, racist theology that says Jesus Christ is returning soon to kill or enslave white people, Jews, homosexuals, and others.”

Certain cultures practice “corrective rape” to “correct” the sexual orientation of Lesbian women. (story here)

I had hoped to post the video, but apparently it has been pulled by the YouTube user who posted it. Some may believe that it’s a good thing that the video was removed, but I disagree. I firmly believe that it is imperative that people like the gentleman captured on tape — who was black, by the way — should be exposed. Why? Because it’s important that people understand that the violence members of the LGBT community face is very real. More importantly, oftentimes the perpetrators of said violence believe they’re doing the Lord’s work, and are justified in inflicting pain emotionally or otherwise. But if you let some opponents tell it, “the gays” are trying to force their “lifestyle” on others. Which is really funny since my Conservative friends thinks the following is racist.

The post Man Uses Bible to Threaten Woman with Rape at Gay Pride Parade appeared first on Madness & Reality.

I must admit, Graham Spanier’s latest job in crisis management for the US government is extremely appropriate. I cannot see a better candidate who can cover up a fuck up (literally) for more than 10 years like the ousted president of Penn State.

Spanier said in a recent email:

“For the next several months, as I transition to my post-presidential plans, I will be working on a special project for the U.S. government relating (to) national security. This builds on my prior positions working with federal agencies to foster improved cooperation between our nation’s national security agencies and other entities.”

I know people who were fired for being short on a cash register by $25, and couldn’t find a job dealing with money, but this guy conspires to hide sexual abuse, and leaves a hero who already has a gig.

Can I say white privelege?

I am scratching my head at how many people I have read about getting life for drug conspiracy and this guy knowingly held information that caused the harm to a number of boys, some we will never know, and he gets carte blanche and high level clearance.

But that shows you the power of institutions, and the length that people will go, even in their ignorance, to protect something that kills them too. We will defend universities and governments the convenient argument that these are individuals, and not representative of the institution.

Welp, journalist Chris Hedges says, “Inherently, all institutions are demonic.”

The post Graham Spanier: From Penn State Sex Scandal Cover Up To National Security Job? appeared first on Madness & Reality.

Looking through the current media available to the African American/Urban audience one could easily come to the conclusion that all Black women are heterosexual, church going, and desperate for marriage. On a recent article I addressed the impact of gender orientation, sexual identity and how it affected a person’s decision of whom they will and will not date.

I was met with the typical response from some commenters that sexual ambiguity is a deal breaker and how can one be sure they shared similar values if the other person is ‘like that’. People are hilarious sometimes, especially when I think of the amount of people who are married to what has recently been identified to me as a ‘beard’.

“Beard is a slang term describing a person who is used, knowingly or unknowingly, as a date, romantic partner (Boyfriend or Girlfriend), or spouse either to conceal infidelity or to conceal one’s sexual orientation.”

Now I don’t mean to be mean or anything, but I do find it peculiar that I am personally aware of waaaay more marriages where one partner is perceived as ‘‘questionable’, than I know of married couples where one spouse openly identified as homosexual, though married to a heterosexual.

I’m not saying that couples have to openly affirm their sexual orientation to society, but its not like people aren’t confused when these relationships are vigorously presented as simply a case of ‘boy meets girl’ when the boy in question has never, ever, ever been interested in girl until he decided to marry —->her.

Dating and marrying a thirty year old virgin doesn’t make a man special. Though some would love to think their un-tampered with unicorn’s lack of interest in mating with men before them, just meant they were waiting for ‘the one’ and he thinks she’s that “one”.

I’m not talking about the sexually conservative, or strict religious followers, I’m just talking about what I consider average peculiar behavior.

Arranged marriages and marriages of convenience are nothing new, but since we’re out here promoting marriage as a willing union and not as a business deal what is to be said about those using marriage as a front to hide their sexual orientation?

Everyone asks questions regarding the sexual orientation of one partner or the other; teachers and other family associates inquire as to the gender identity of the parent and at some point in time everyone begins to wonder what the REAL deal is.

While I have no problem with any couple (gay, straight or mixed) that marries for the sake of wanting to be together to take on life as a team what I do have a problem with are people who feel that it’s okay to front for the sake of saving face.

One partner marries someone whom they know could never love them the way they want but they are still willing to take a fraud of a relationship in order to feel special. One partner may sit idly by while the other partner continues to maintain their REAL romantic relationship with a same sex partner who they call their ‘best friend’. Yes, the bills are paid, the family piles into the car to attend church on Sundays and the portraits do look amazing but is this how you saw your marriage?

Surely this satisfies the requirement for some people’s definition of marriage but pardon me if I want more. Using a person as a front is selfish and cruel; allowing yourself to be used as a front shows desperation. Unfortunately, your willingness to be a tool won’t barter you the love you seek.

I’m not a witch doctor hunting down the mythical DL brothers because that facet of life is merely a half truth at best. But just as much as a man or woman has to be willing to lie and deceive others regarding his/her sexuality he/she must also have a partner who is willing to eat those lies and lick the bowl clean. If the wedding ring is more important than being able to look yourself and your spouse in the eye then the marriage isn’t worth the paper it’s written on.

You may say these unions are no one business but their own…I disagree.

I do know White couples, Asian couples and some Middle Eastern couples who are married to a homosexual partner in spite of the variation of sexual orientation. They have chosen to live their lives this way for their own reasons, but what I do see is that they care about each other and their relationship is authentic, as it should be.

With the shortage of Black male dating prospects out here I’m sure there are plenty of women who would be willing to look the other way and forgive past transgressions for a man who was willing to ‘get saved’ and change his body language, social circle and friends in order to give a respectable “go” of the marriage.

But how many of them would marry a plain old bi/gay male who was willing to do the same thing but for change his orientation and sexual identity……not many I bet.

When little potential future homosexual children seek examples of who they will be when they grow up it saddens me to know the amount of people out there who are willing to lie and let lie rather than those willing to accept their authentic selves and each other.

With no space to exist some will feel forced to fit into roles that require them to wear a mask and there will be those heterosexual people right there ready for them when they do.

The post Gay People DO Get Married: The Curious Case of the Beard – When “the Gays” Marry Straight People appeared first on Madness & Reality.

Its my understanding that one of the occupational hazards of being Black is that one is more familiar with the Baptist church then they are with the teachings of the Roman Catholic church. Luckily, I was raised Roman Catholic and the Vatican is part of my vocabulary, so I don’t feel left out this time around. While I’m not here to split hairs regarding the pro versus con on all monolithic religions what I will say is that there seems to be more similarities between them then not when it comes to scandal, dick slippage, affairs, lies and deception.

The Rev. Thomas Williams, a moral theologian and prominent American author, lecturer and television personality, said in a statement he was “deeply sorry for this grave transgression” against his vows of celibacy.

Williams, the author of such books as 2008’s “Knowing Right From Wrong: A Christian Guide to Conscience,” was the superior of the Legion’s general directorate in Rome in the late 1990s and early 2000s. More recently, he taught theology, promoted his books and lectured widely.

I don’t know why its so complicated for these men! If they simply described the pregnancy using ownership words like ‘I fathered a child’ then we could stop pretending like we don’t know what the hell their saying.

I’m not surprised by this and I think its safe to say the public stopped being shocked and awed years ago but for a few very gullible people that prefer to deny this pattern or those with an interest in keeping their secrets in tact.

The Legion has been beset by scandal following revelations that its late founder, the Rev. Marciel Maciel, fathered three children with two women and sexually abused his seminarians. Maciel died in 2008, and in 2009 the Legion admitted to his crimes.

The Maciel scandal has been particularly sensational given that the Mexican-born priest was held up by Pope John Paul II as a model for the faithful, with his priests admired for their orthodoxy and ability to bring in money and attract new seminarians.

Just last week, the Legion admitted that seven of its priests were under investigation by the Vatican for allegedly sexually abusing minors — suggesting that the same culture of secrecy and silence that Maciel used to cover his crimes enabled other priests to abuse children.

THE LEGION OF CHRIST *blank stare* are the latest culprit in this week’s headlines. As usual, there is no direct admission of guilt by the hypocritical upper echelon gaggle of man sandals and the organization as a whole shows evidence that it is willing to cover up discrepancies for the sake of revenue and power.  How typical.

Honestly, if this is the type of behavior religious followers prescribe to then I say its high time to disassemble these bastards sect by sect for the betterment of civilized society. If a group of guys want to live together in harmony then they should support gay marriage rights. If a group of men want to live in the hills and have wild outlandish sex with their apprentices then they should present themselves as such, because I know of plenty of people that are into that sort of thing, they’re called ‘subs’ in the kink circle.

And while others would spin their wheels discussing nuances of faith and salvation, I would rather get to the heart of the matter, which seems to be that religious organizations do women and children more harm than good for the sake of money and power.

Secret sex, lies, bastard children, unwed mothers, questions of financial support, abuse of power, and money.

Women, babies, church resources, questions of financial obligations, and YOU ARE THE FATHER..exactly the reason why the Vatican restricted marriage among members, who is going to take care of all these dam babies!?

The church is very rich, and its resources should be protected, like any other tool of exploitation. This isn’t rocket science.

Either way, all the drama sounds like the makings of a Good Book to me, though I’m eager to find out how this ends, I worry about what the masses will do once their ‘moral’ yardstick is taken away. What would Jesus Do…? My guess is…he’d run screaming away from these ‘religious leaders’ but I”m an atheist so what do I know?

The post The Legion of Christ Sex Scandal: Oh, Father God… He’s Just My Baby Daddy!! appeared first on Madness & Reality.

What would you do if you came home and accidently discovered your daughter making out with another girl? Would you be surprised? Hurt or alarmed? Would you think she’s going through a ‘growing phase’ and then seek therapy for her, you know, so that she could fix her problem?

You might even be so desperate for help that you reach out to a local radio show host like one father did recently for this exact same issue.

In response to an email from a listener concerning his daughter’s interest in girls, DJ Dominic Deiter declared over the air that the father could cure his daughter budding lesbianism by, “You should get one of your friends to screw your daughter straight.”

Once a person includes the words ‘father’, ‘daughter’,  ’your friends’ and ‘rape’ in the same sentence it becomes difficult to make things get worse than what they already are. However, the impact of the statement from this asshole gets even more insulting when you realize this is a broadcast from the ‘Rover’s Morning Glory’ radio program airing on WWMS 100.7 FM radio station.

This station is owned by Clear Channel Communications, also the home of Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, and the rest of those red throat-ed eels. Bain Capital, the company that Mitt Romney began and is still involved with, is the majority owner of Clear Channel so as you can see, the gangs all here and doing what they do which is talk hateful and ignorant shit to the masses unfortunate enough to listen to it.

Of course this didn’t go over well with the folks over at GLAAD who had the following to say.

GLAAD’s Director of News & Field Media Aaron McQuade says “It was appalling and dangerous for this show to tell a father that he should have one of his friends rape his daughter. That’s essentially how Dieter responded to this listener, and this is no laughing matter in a world where people are too often the victims of violence and sexual assault based on their actual or perceived sexual orientation. And Dieter gave this vile advice to everyone who was listening, including educators, parents and children – sending the message that it’s okay to physically or sexually abuse people who are perceived to be gay.”

I’m not sure what it is that’s got my head so fucked up these days. As I sit down to write about certain topics I’m forced to reflect on myself and what it is that I’m trying to say to you people.

Sometimes the journey through what “is” and “is not” okay and what “is” and “is not” fucked up is still blurry in my world. Like when I hear about the sexual assault of a person who identifies as gay or is suspected of being gay, I can barely muster the interest to bat an eyelash because its part of what happens when you ‘choose’ to be gay. Being both gay and a woman makes the chance that a woman will be the victim of sexual assault that much more likely.

Dominic Dieter: Radio DJ, Potential Rapist, & Definitely Misogynist

Sexual assault is more prevalent for some people in society than for others and focusing on how wrong rape is immediately makes one also realize how common sexual assault is. The further you go down on the societal totem pole the more likely you are to be a victim of sexual assault.

The chances increase as you add various factors to the situation such as economics, race and especially sexual orientation, because the ladder makes a question of what one does up for public debate. Being gay or perceived as gay is something that is viewed as wrong by closed minded ignorant people of all nationalities, races and gender.

LGBT people insult everyone else with their presence so not only is the act of raping a gay person a sexual assault, it is also a hate crime because the initial motivation for the sexual assault is to exhibit power over another person because of their gender orientation or perception thereof.

Rape is about power.

The rape of a gay person is about power and erasure. It is a double theft of a person’s right to self determination and privacy.

The value of the victim decreases as the biases increase and I’m sure there were plenty of insecure men and quivering homophobics who agreed that indeed, a gay woman (or any woman for that matter) should have ‘the gay fucked out of her’ because there’s nothing more threatening to the world then a woman who isn’t susceptible or receptive to the almighty penis.

The post Female Sexual Assault + Hate Crime = How Men Turn Lesbians Straight? appeared first on Madness & Reality.

One of my biggest qualms as a professional and lifelong advocate is the clear division that we see after college in the social science and activist realm. What I mean, mostly, is that men are told to enter into “real” careers and forget those true lessons that they attained in college through their advocacy, while women are allowed to delve into fields where one would anticipate requires less logic and more emotion (which, I will personally let you know, is a load of shit). Undoubtedly, as human beings, this might be why parents continue to engender the gender typification; I say this as a non-parent, of course, but as a student of the human condition and behaviors. The lessons that parents and other life teachers delegate are often “gender specific”, and not inclusive to people who do not fit in certain categories as defined by the instructor.

Largely, a vast majority of rape education and prevention techniques (and I certainly have my issues with that) is directly specifically at women, who are 90% of victims. Now, before I go further, I want to make sure that we are clear in exactly what we are discussing (and where I am gathering my statistics). For the sake of clarity, ‘rape’ is defined, and has traditionally been defined, as penal-vaginal forced intercourse, where ‘sexual assault’ has been defined as other forms of sexual violations, including anal, oral, and sodomy with objects. Sexual assault is important to consider because it provides for the inclusion of same-sex forced sex, which is not necessarily indicative of sexual violations within the LGBTQQI community. Instead, it also captures sexual assaults that involve hazing where the perpetrators and victims may identify as heterosexual. While rape does occur in homosexual relationships, people in the LGBT community are more often raped by people who identify as heterosexual especially as a form of “corrective” rape, which is more commonly perpetrated on women who are attracted to women. (If you need to take a minute to think about that, you may do so now. Don’t make me explain to you that rape is not about sex or sexuality, but rather power and control.)

If any of you have been paying attention to the news, the FBI expanded the definition of rape to include forcible oral or anal sexual contact, earlier this month. This is wonderful because it erases the duality in how we perceive forced and involuntary sexual contact, and it provides that the LGBT community is better captured and included as well. However, as I understand it, this new definition thus far is simply for statistics sake and will not change any legal conditions once these crimes have been reported. For the sake of this post, and in focusing on Men Can Stop Rape‘s new ad campaign, let’s continue to address the previous definition of rape on women, and consider involuntary sexual contact specifically on college campuses.

Men Can Stop Rape is an advocacy group based in Washington DC who challenges issues of masculinity, boundaries, and healthy circumstances that include rape prevention and advocacy, toward men. While I take issue with the idea of, and false dichotomy that is, ‘masculinity’ and ‘femininity’, their mission is poignant and clear: men are likely to commit sexual offenses and men are likely to listen to other men, so men have the ability to aid in the prevention of these ultimate violations. From their website:

We at Men Can Stop Rape believe that stereotypical masculinity (or any other term you might choose: traditional masculinity, hypermasculinity, hegemonic masculinity, dominant masculinity) is still too much the air that we breathe. It’s something we often take in automatically, unaware. As one of the significant sources of violence against women across the globe, as well as other forms of violence, and as an unconscious source of conflict for many men, stereotypical masculinity causes great harm when it goes unrecognized. We all benefit from consciously developing healthier, non-violent masculinities.

Recently, the organization has created a bystander intervention campaign called the “Where Do You Stand” campaign, intended to get men involved when they notice particular situations going awry. I won’t insult your intelligence by inferring whether or not you know what the ‘bystander effect‘ is (but there’s a link to a wonderful essay, just in case); however, at one point it was estimated that the bystander effect was present during at least 30% of sexual offenses. 30% of the time, a person could have intervened and may have prevented a rape or sexual assault from occurring, or could have called the police once an act was initiated, and did not. As a matter of fact, of you google “bystander effect and rape”, you will find countless results with several different recent news stories. For that reason alone, this campaign is remarkable.
The ad is intended for college campuses and includes the following posters with the materials:

anti-rape-mens-ad

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It really gets tiring as a relatively young, single woman that you should only go out in groups, using the buddy system, holding hands, using code words, watching drinks, and never trusting anyone. I’m suspicious by nature, but I reject the notion that we should leave our houses be afraid of what may be lurking outside in the bushes, especially due to the fact that 40% of rapes and sexual assaults occur in the victim’s home and 2/3 of completed rapes are by a person that the victim knows. I do, however, believe that advocacy and balanced education on all fronts is how we defeat any ailment in our society. Silly enough, those men’s rights groups who think women who want an end to rape are just whiny, bitchy feminists who “want to be men…but want to keep their pussy pass” are hardly worth addressing on this blog. They clearly don’t understand the dynamics of rape or sexual assault, and are comfortable in their own probably-pale bigoted right-wing skin. By all means, live your lives. (I did come across that comment on a men’s rights website, ergo the quotations, and I hope someone Google-bombs the shit out of the website.)

The post Men Can Stop Rape: New Ad Campaign Targeting Men Launched appeared first on Madness & Reality.

I work, both professionally and otherwise, in a field of advocacy; yet, when I have an opportunity at work to network with people of other agencies in different capacities, as a social butterfly and generally nosy investigative person, I do so. I’m also one of those do-gooders who believes in being kind to people, as you never know what they have on their minds or in their experiences that could be plaguing them.

I say all this, in essence, to tell a short story:

I was at work a few days ago, and jokingly commented to a young, high ranking security officer in my building that he looked tired. He came and sat next to me in a chair and explained that he had been up late, reading the news online, and that he did not even remember getting in bed last night. He smiled one of those smiles where, even though we only knew each other on the ‘hi and bye’, you knew it was feigned. Like he wanted to smile because he was a friendly person in general, but deep down something was wrong; he then began to reveal that he often has trouble sleeping. You see, he is from The Congo and is rightfully, righteously obsessed with international news since his family and friends are still in the area.

His eyes got very sad as he both sadly and quietly told me that 50 women are raped every hour in The Congo, and that no one says anything about it. That CNN doesn’t report these things until someone makes a documentary on HBO about it because it doesn’t benefit them to report so he searches current events on several other news sites, as he speaks five different languages. That women and young girls are often raped, gang raped, by the government and rebel, in front of their children and then – as if this is not brutal enough – shot to death in the head, all over their bodies, in their genitals, and regarded as nothing. This has been occurring for decades and we, humans in general, do nothing.

From the HBO Documentary “The Greatest Silence: Rape in The Congo”

I don’t profess to be as sharp about international affairs as I should be; one of my best friends is from Somalia and my desire to grow more informed about policy sparked in the initial phases of our friendship years ago. My conversation with my colleague from DRC affected me. I suppose I do not have any solutions or a formal proposal. I don’t know that I could have affected readers that way that my colleague’s anguish moved me days ago.

My hope is to increase awareness and to provide resources:

Women for Women International
The IRC in Democratic Republic of Congo
Human Rights Watch – Congo
Panzi Hospital of Bukavu

More resources.

The post The Rape That Goes Silent appeared first on Madness & Reality.

Okay, so now that you’ve heard about the Penn State sex scandal, let’s talk about the white version of Eddie Long. A slightly more sicker version, but nothing close to the Vatican cover up, the Penn State scandal is about a man who abused young boys, was busted but was concealed by an institution that is more worried about its reputation and money than the crimes committed.

Still today Penn State and its supporters are more concerned with maintaining its reputation than reparations for families that have been passed over and disrupted by a sick fuck. BTW, I wouldn’t have wanted my son next to a guy with teeth like the Devil. Do you see those canines? Yuck.

Jerry Loves The Kids

But the rabbit hole, or the anus hole goes deeper than the walls of Penn State. Sandusky’s sexual abuse has been on record since the 90s with a partial confession from Sandusky in a criminal investigation by local police officers reported in this article.

Apparently, parents have complained about Sandusky repeatedly, but somehow, these allegations slipped into the crevices of law enforcement bureaucracy. Interestingly, Pookie Jenkins can get time for half a gram of crack lodged in the crease of his pants, but a well-respected pedophile has to rape about a dozen or so boys to have substantial evidence.

Then the information about some of the young boys possibly being forced into a child-sex ring that prostituted them to big Penn State donors opens a can of worms that many in power do not want to see come out. You know that movie with Tom Cruise, “Eyes Wide Shut” that wasn’t just a fiction flick, it happens, and it is especially tantalizing when children are brought into the equation.

FACT: Child sex rings are commonplace among the elite in America. England isn’t the only country that has a high child abduction and prostitution ring. The United States covers up countless child sex scandals that involved wealthy sick fuckers and connected fuckers who flick off those assaulted like hardened boogers. Take for instance the White House scandals in the Reagan and Bush 1 and Bush 2 era.

However, let us remember who is really damaged in this case. Information was borrowed from a NY Times article.

VICTIM 1 He was 11 or 12 years old when he met Sandusky in 2005 or 2006 through the Second Mile, a charity Sandusky set up to help disadvantaged boys. The coach gave the boy gifts — golf clubs, a computer, clothes — and often had him stay at his house in a basement bedroom.

Sandusky would crawl into bed with him, have the boy lie on top of him and “crack his back,” pulling the boy against him and then rubbing his back. The grand jury said Sandusky performed oral sex on the boy more than 20 times in 2007 and 2008 and had the boy perform oral sex on him once.

VICTIM 2 A boy, about 10 years old, was seen naked in a locker-room shower at Penn State with Sandusky in 2002 by Mike McQueary, then a 28-year-old graduate assistant and aspiring coach. The grand jury report said McQueary saw the boy “with his hands up against the wall, being subjected to anal intercourse by a naked Sandusky.”

VICTIM 3 A boy, about 13, was invited by Sandusky in 2000 to his home for dinners, to go on walks and to attend Penn State football games. They exercised together and then showered. Sandusky patted him, rubbed his shoulders, washed his hair and gave him bear hugs. The boy stayed at Sandusky’s home, where Sandusky blew on his stomach, rubbed the inside of his thigh and touched his genitals.

VICTIM 4 A boy, 12 or 13, “was repeatedly subjected to involuntary deviate sexual intercourse and indecent assault at the hands of Sandusky,” the report said. Contact took place in 1996 or 1997 in the locker-room shower and in hotel rooms. Sandusky gave the boy dozens of gifts — sports equipment, clothes and passes to sporting events — and threatened to send him home from the Alamo Bowl in San Antonio when the boy resisted his advances.

VICTIM 5 A boy, 7 or 8, was invited in 1995 or 1996 to Sandusky family events and football games. When the boy was 8 or 10, Sandusky would roughhouse with him, then say they needed to shower. At one point, Sandusky, naked, pinned the boy against a wall in the shower, then placed the boy’s hand on his genitals. The boy slid away, and Sandusky never touched him again.

VICTIM 6 When the boy was 11, in 1998, Sandusky was driving him to the university and put his hand on his thigh in the car. At the university they wrestled and Sandusky said they needed to shower. He lathered the boy in soap and bear-hugged him from behind. After the boy’s mother reported the incident to the university, Sandusky told investigators that he was wrong and that “I wish I were dead.”

VICTIM 7 A boy, about 10, was invited in 1994 to numerous events and sleepovers at Sandusky’s. After a couple of years, Sandusky began putting his hand on the boy’s thigh while they were driving and on at least one occasion put his hands down the boy’s pants, though never touching his genitals. Sandusky bear-hugged him, cracked his back and shared showers.

VICTIM 8 An unidentified “young” boy was seen in the shower with Sandusky at Penn State in 2000 by a university janitor. The janitor said Sandusky had pinned the boy against the wall and was performing oral sex on him.

Listen to this animal in his own words:

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