Last Friday night just before going to bed, my wife thought it was important for me to see the video that err’bpdy and their mama was talkin’ ’bout here in Memphis last week. Which is really funny because I hadn’t heard a word about this in the news locally; but, I suppose that’s what I get for paying attention to national politics and the foolishness that comes out of other cities other than my own. So I look at this video, and my initial thought after my jaw hit the floor was: “Damn, the strip club is off the hook like a mugg!” Yeah, being as married as long as I have, let’s just say that it’s been a while since I stepped into such an establishment to be, er, entertained. But then it was explained that it was an actual nightclub around the way and not your everyday booty shake joint, and I was floored. I wasn’t the only one appalled by the display of reckless hedonism:

(Memphis) – Video that was posted online promoting a racy Memphis party has captured the attention of police.

The party was thrown by a group called Team Taboo

WREG caught up with the spokesperson of the organization to talk about what Team Taboo does.

“It’s an organization for the people of Memphis,” Kenny Lee said. “People who don’t have family we take them in.”

That’s how Kenny Lee originally described his organization Team Taboo.

The same group who promoted one of its community functions with a steamy video.

It shows young adult popping champagne bottles and engaging in various sex acts.

Some so explicit we can’t show them on TV.

“I am not proud of the video. I was upset after watching it,” he said.

Lee originally denounced the video and even wrote a statement to the media saying Team Taboo does not promote anything illegal or demeaning.

But after questioning Lee for several minutes he admitted his group did in fact release the video.

“We released the video,” he said.”We did.”

He also admitted the groups real focus is on the party.

“We’re an organization in the City of Memphis just like a number of the organizations. We’re just more on the X-Rated side I would say,” Lee said.

That X-Rated content captured in this video has captured the attention of local law enforcement. They are trying to figure out if any laws were broken at the party held at Club Elements.

“We are in the process to see what the owners knew. What information they were privileged too. If we have enough, we’ll proceed with public nuisance charges,” Memphis Police Chief Tony Armstrong.

We couldn’t get hold of Club Elements, but Lee says his group did nothing wrong. He added everyone at the party was consenting adults.

“You had to be 18 years of age to get into that party,” he said. “They I.D.’d everybody.”
He also vowed his parties won’t be stopping anytime soon.

“I mean we are party people you know what i mean,” Lee said. “We get down.”

A community-based organization that’s into giving back, my ass! What are they giving back? A new generation of single mothers struggling to survive while lil’ Raheem or Keisha wonders, “Where’s my daddy?” I’m sorry, but aren’t they contributing to the already startling numbers that places Memphis, TN. number one when it comes to STDs (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) and Infant Mortality rates? Shit, I don’t know what Team Taboo spokesman Kenny Lee is talking about; but hell, they might as well be running around handing out free crack to the community.

Here’s what they’re about from their Facebook Fan Page:

Team Taboo Heaux

A couple of pep have asked me how did I come up with the idea for the group. Well the meaning of “Taboo” is prohibited., and is defined as a social prohibition relating to any area of human activity or social custom. For example, its considered as a “Taboo” from a societal standpoint if people: have oral sex, 3somes, are bisexual, swallow nut, lick ass, lick toes, balls, smoke weed, drink liquor, go to strip clubs, fuck doggy style,etc and basically do all of the fun shit in life. Ironically, people still do all of these things and go through extreme measures to hide it..some people pay thousands of dollars and go to Vegas to have their first 3some, some millionaires don’t live the exotic lives that we live in our empire…

[...]The people who you would least expect, the celebrities, doctors, judges, preachers, political figures, teachers, lawyers, judges, and any other human being damn near all do what we do, they just try to hide it from the eyes of society. It feels great being able to be yourself without being judged. Me personally, I don’t give 2 fucks about what people think about me and have lived my life freely, but im aware tht there were females who were hesitant to admit that they wanted a 3some w 2 guys or that they wanted to experience a woman…but they never acted upon their thoughts or fantasies outta fear of ridicule from their peers and embarrassment..

[...]but what they fail to realize was tht their peers actually was prly thinkn the same freaky shit as them…Ive saw where people had went thru molestation as children and felt dirty n had low self-esteem. The Taboo is a place where a person can sit back and laugh at the obstacles tht they encountered in their past and actually discuss them with open-minded people without being judged. I was molested by my babysitter at the age of 7, she use to beat my ass n force me to eat her pussy, but now I can laugh at it and prly would thank her for the training at such an early age lol..

[...]I could hypnotize a female with my tongue along at the age of 12 lol… I wanted to bring people inside of my world and my life and experience the fun that ive been havn for years. It’s a great feeling be able to express yourself freely without caring about what people think about you. We are trend-setters in the Taboo. The Taboo is a liberal empire that doesn’t live by societal expectations and views, we have our own set of rules and moral codes in this empire that basically plays as an advocator for self-happiness, a place of peace, solace, and an eradicator of stress, and low self-esteem for each loyal Diamond and King within us. I know half of yall prly didn’t read all of this, but this is for the pep who our really interested in what they are representing. When someone asks “What is the Taboo”, I don’t like when people reply tht we are a “Sex Group”….yes true enough we are some freaky mofos but this group represents way more than sex…..I could actually write all day about other things we reperesent…. But just know tht the Taboo is also a place where you don’t have to be a rapper, rockstar or pornstar, to have an amazing sex life…….

Now I don’t know if you grasp just how utterly ridiculous the video happens to be. Maybe in your mind I’m just a typical old dude hatin’ on the activities of young folk. Yeah, you know, just like our parents and grandparents did to us back in the day? Although I haven’t been to a nightclub in some years, trust me, I’m definitely not that guy. As a matter of fact, everyone who knows me will tell you that I’m the guy who will forever stay young at heart; heck, most of them will tell you that I don’t even look my age. Be that as it may, this stuff is out of control; and as far as “community organization,” the group Team Taboo needs their asses kicked for this bullshit. I’m gonna warn you, this isn’t safe for work; again, the following is very explicit; and shouldn’t be viewed around children:

Yeah, I could see a rape case developing at one of these parties…

Now I don’t know if any laws were broken, but I’m willing to bet that many were. First of all, the party was open to folks 18 and older. Now I don’t know how things are where you may live, but strip clubs here in Memphis are strictly open to adults 21-years-old and above. And you wanna hear something even crazier? I showed the video to my 18-year-old daughter who’s on her way to college next semester in Atlanta of all places, as a teachable moment. She was just as stunned as I was after viewing it; and, even more shocking is that she recognized a few kids that attend the high school she recently graduated. Yep, and she also noted that some of them were younger than her.

So yeah, I’d say there were laws broken. The one good thing, however, is that I know my daughter refuses to attend or participate in any fuction foolishness that mirrors anything like Team Taboo has produced here in Memphis, in Atlanta, or anywhere. I don’t know about you, but I’m comfortable knowing what my kid is up to; unfortunately, there are a lot of parents who cannot say that they are.

At the end of the day I don’t know who to blame, nor can I figure out just how we got here. I do know that this isn’t a “black thing” as much as some may make it out to be; or an example of one of the many pathological issues associated with the lived African-American experience. No, this isn’t a direct result of a lack of education, poverty, or single motherhood often used to explain dysfunctional and destructive behavior. Instead, I see this as a societal problem; a problem which if anything, exacerbated by explosion the internet, in an attempt to feed our already voyeuristic nature, now more than ever. I could be wrong, and I’m open to correction by way of a discussion; but, at the end of the day it’s about corrective action.

Am I right, or am I right:

But hey, don’t tell that to the folks on Twitter who obviously approve.

The post Team Taboo Under Fire: Police Investigate Memphis Group’s Nightclub Sex Party Viral Video [NSFW] appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.

OK, so maybe I’m a little different and I don’t; but I guess being outspoken against the coontastic behavior of people with whom I share a melanin affliction, makes me a prime candidate to support such a move. However, not to shit on anyone’s dreams, but this petition is as stupid as the day the NAACP assembled folks in Detroit several years ago to host a mock funeral for the word “nigger,” in protest of lyrics in Hip Hop. A symbolic gesture at best, but as far as impact or the ability to promote and produce change? Welp, the lyrics haven’t changed, and they’re on television.

I, like many of you, watched in complete horror as a cable network debuted yet another reality drama based on black life as it purportedly unfolds in the ATL. I will refrain from mentioning the name of this show because if you saw it then you already know what I’m referring to and if you didn’t then I do not wish to entice or encourage you to seek it out. In fact, the more that I reflect on my feelings about what I witnessed Monday evening, the more I realize that my disgust lies not just with that particular show alone, but with the way that the city which was once a symbol of black progress is now being portrayed in the media as a whole.

Series after series I have watched with great chagrin as popular reality TV franchises select the jewel of the south to lift the veil of mystique behind the city’s affluent and create what ultimately amounts to a ratings bonanza for the networks and a cash windfall for the producers.

Time after time, executive producers from L.A. and New York, where I currently reside- bring their camera crews and A/V techs into our city to create what inevitably amounts to the Jerry Springer equivalent of the franchise’s northern counterparts. A series that historically featured the diamond encrusted lives of wealthy spouses debuted an Atlanta version of the series where the wealth was elusive and spouses were no longer a requirement. More recently, a show about popular entertainers and the women who love them premiered an Atlanta-based installment where the term popular was subjective and women suggested that other women should be put “on the track,” a prostitution reference that is particularly damaging for a city that is already noted for being one of the largest hubs for child sex trafficking in the world. To put it mildly I was offended. To state I plainly, I was aghast.

How is it that a city which was once the crowning jewel in the story of black America has allowed itself to be positioned as the melting pot of black affliction? The Atlanta that I knew and grew up in was one of great pride and self-respect. Our achievements were known across the globe, as people from far and wide would often respond, “Wow, I hear that black people are really doing their thing down there,” when I would tell them I’m from Atlanta. Today that assertion is often met with “Yoooo….I hear Atlanta’s got them bangin’ strip clubs.” …Really?!?

Um, who do you think told us about those bangin’ strip clubs, Kelly? I dunno, but my guess is that it wasn’t some rapper from Des Moine, Iowa. Which is actually kinda funny when you think about the fact that it’s white folks who are largely buying Hip Hop music, and even watching the show.

With 3.6 million people having watched he premiere, surely they aren’t all black.

Yeah, but now somebody has the gall to start a petition on change.org of all places? I’m not a comedian, but the fact that they’re using a website known to advance significant change — you know, like getting George Zimmerman arrested, and countless other issues related to social justice? — to get this particular show off the air, should be the punchline of the year in Negronia. Shit, whatever happened to hitting the pavement or using the internet to get people registered to vote? Nah, that’s not as important as the social activism associated with hating the foolishness on VH1.

Check out the petition:

After we made a ruckus about Basketball Wives, sponsors began to pull ads. Well, it’s that time again, folks!

While we should respect the perceptions and experiences of the men and women featured on “reality” television shows, networks are airing stories that could be very helpful for people to hear, but they’re telling these stories in EXTREMELY dangerous ways.

We all know premium digital crack rock is ‘slanged’ in digital hoods other than VH1. We also know the problem is not just TV–it’s a big, mean, social monster that we’ve gotta shoot down one non-violent bullet at a time. Nevertheless, somebody’s gotta be the face of this lovely movement. And since VH1 has chosen to give us yet another beautifully-blinged jewel of commercial exploitation (Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta), they might as well be the face of change. By the way, shout out to all African Americans who received Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta as their Juneteenth gift! You won and lost at the same time!

As we work toward national- and local-level change, let’s tell VH1 and their sponsors (again) why people from a broad range of backgrounds will NOT stand for the exploitation of the lived experiences of people who may not even know they’re being exploited. This isn’t a “Black or White” thing, this is a HUMAN thing…and we should all understand.

P.S. That “turn of the TV/your kids’ TV if you don’t want to watch” argument doesn’t work here, VH1. A good number of the kids who are most at risk don’t have the luxury of living with parents who can just “turn off the TV”. Why? Because their parents are out working multiple jobs (thanks to this lovely thing called poverty); one or both parents are on drugs, dead, or in jail; or they’re raised by ill grandparents, relatives who aren’t that interested in their future, or foster parents who abuse them and only foster to collect a check.

So now y’all wanna boycott Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta after enabling all the fuckery VH1, Bravo, and Oxygen has provided? Nah, why boycott now? Shit, why not wait until they choose to portray black women as the throwback “Aunt Jemima with a head scarf” character, who’s happy to be slaving in the homes of rich white folks? You know, sorta like The Help but the reality TV version of it? Yeah, let’s wait for that one before we start this talk about boycotts. After all, didn’t we do this shit to ourselves? Yep, Rick James was right: “They never shoulda gave you niggas money!” But then again, that’s how exploitation works. Hell, who better than black folks — or more specifically black women — to once again take pleasure in our exploitation? After all, there’s no way a dope fiend can exist without someone close to enable him or her, or someone to push their poison on them, right?

Man please, start a petition to get Negroes jobs and I’ll be down.

The post How About Registering Voters Instead of a “Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta” Boycott Petition? appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.

Now let’s say after the wife accuses said husband about his possible infidelity, mister accused cheating husband gets pissed because of the accusation and leaves the room only to return with a gun, stand and put a bullet in the chamber, and fires at his wife while two of her children are standing with her. Given that scenario, would you say that said husband deserves to be in prison for aggravated assault with a deadly weapon? Yeah I know, this all sounds like a scene from a movie or an episode of “(I Almost) Got Away With It,” on your cable. However, this is exactly what occurred in real life on August 10th, 2010 and the shooter was not the husband, but instead, Marissa Alexander who is currently serving a 20 year sentence for firing what she continues to claim as a warning shot at her husband Rico Gray after he accused her of cheating with her ex-husband, Lincoln Alexander.

We’ve all heard Marissa’s account, but here’s what Gray had to say in speaking to Jacksonvile.com. In an article by Charles Broward, Gray contends that contrary to belief it was Marissa’s violent nature that lead to the shooting, and not the image of him cast as an abusive wife beater. Speaking at the State Attorney’s office in Jacksonville, Gray explained his account of how the event which landed his wife in prison unfolded. Since there are always three sides to a story, let’s hear his:

He said it was Alexander, 31, who first began punching him after he confronted her about some text messages she had sent to her ex-husband.

Gray said he put his hands up in defense “buying time” for his two sons to gather their belongings so he could take them and leave. But when he made the remark that their newborn baby must be fathered by her ex-husband, he said she immediately stopped.

“She said, ‘I got something for your — —,’ and walked away,” Gray said. “I knew exactly what she was going to do.”

Gray said she went to the garage, to her truck, to get her gun and then returned back inside the home. He said the garage door that she claimed was inoperable worked for him earlier that morning and later that day with no trouble.

“When she came back inside, the first thing I saw was her putting one [a bullet] in the chamber,” he said.

Gray said by the time his kids had come to his side to leave, she had the gun pointed at him.

“As soon as I took my eyes off Marissa, that’s when I heard the gunshot,” Gray said.

He said he never looked back, grabbing the children and running out of the house and down the street.

[...] Gray said he lied during an initial deposition when he said he had been the aggressor because the couple had settled their differences and gotten back together. He said he didn’t want to see his wife go to prison.

It was after Alexander assaulted him again less than five months later that he decided to no longer support her. She pleaded no contest to domestic battery in that incident and was sentenced to time served. (source)

Now given Gray’s account, can you honestly say that there’d be all this uproar and calls for action like the national day of protest on behalf of Marissa on June 24th, if she was a man? No seriously, I’d really like to hear your thoughts on this. Of course I understand it’s hard to imagine a woman being abusive towards her husband or even aggressive in that regard. Yes, and given that Marissa’s story as told by herself and her supporters has made Gray out to be Ike Turner on steroids and bath salts, It’s hard for most to see her as the aggressor in this instance; heck, women never lie.

Listen to Rico Gray Sr.’s 911 recording:

The post Forget Race: Would Marissa Alexander be in Prison if She was a Man who Acted in Fear? appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.

Not that I’m sympathetic to people who shoot and kill unarmed black youth. But on the contrary, I figured the lead story in the media this week would be what Kelly Virella reported over at Dominion Of New York. She introduced us to what I think to be a significant study, which concludes that in the state of Florida, contrary to popular opinion, black folks have fared better within the state’s judicial system since the 2005 implementation of the now infamous “stand your ground” or “shoot to kill” law. One would think a such a story as covered by Kelly, would have made major headlines; but, I suppose such a revelation or finding isn’t as polarizing as the typical race-related story or incident the mainstream media craves. That is, with the exception of the good folks from the Tampa Bay Times, of course:

A Tampa Bay Times analysis of nearly 200 cases — the first to examine the role of race in “stand your ground” — found that people who killed a black person walked free 73 percent of the time, while those who killed a white person went free 59 percent of the time.

[...] The Times analysis found no obvious bias in how black defendants have been treated:

• Whites who invoked the law were charged at the same rate as blacks.

• Whites who went to trial were convicted at the same rate as blacks.

• In mixed-race cases involving fatalities, the outcomes were similar. Four of the five blacks who killed a white went free; five of the six whites who killed a black went free.

• Overall, black defendants went free 66 percent of the time in fatal cases compared to 61 percent for white defendants — a difference explained, in part, by the fact blacks were more likely to kill another black.

“Let’s be clear,” said Alfreda Coward, a black Fort Lauderdale lawyer whose clients are mostly black men. “This law was not designed for the protection of young black males, but it’s benefiting them in certain cases.”

The Times analysis does not prove that race caused the disparity between cases with black and white victims. Other factors may be at play.

The analysis, for example, found that black victims were more likely to be carrying a weapon when they were killed. They also were more likely than whites to be committing a crime, such as burglary, at the time.

Experts note that most cases have unique combinations of facts and circumstances that determine whether a person goes free or goes to prison. They caution against drawing conclusions on statistics alone.

Now, we have the U.S. Commission on Civil Rights launching an investigation into whether there’s a racial bias applied to the law which grants defendants the ability to use deadly force, without having the duty to retreat from a confrontation. According to the commission, there may be signs of bias:

Data compiled by the Wall Street Journal shows a near-doubling of justifiable homicides from 2005-2011 in states where SYG [Stand Your Ground] has passed. Moreover, their data shows that while white killers of black victims comprises only 3.1% of all homicides, such cross-racial killing constitute 15.6% of justifiable homicides.

A separate FBI study found that, “34% of cases involving a white shooter killing a black person were deemed as a justifiable homicide. Meanwhile, in similar situations, when the shooter was black and the victim was white, the homicide was ruled justifiable only 3.3% of the time.”

While I welcome the U.S. Commission on Civil Rights’ investigation and pending release of their finding about one year from now, we must be careful in our rush to judgement. It’s easy to look at those numbers above and arrive at the conclusion, that the laws application has be wrought with racial bias. But there are a couple things to consider when you spout the notion that when white folks kill black folks, under stand your ground, they’re somehow egregiously justified.

One would be, just as the Florida study points out above, at least in their state, black victims were more likely (than white victims) to be acting in the commission of a crime, or to be in possession of a weapon; and, let’s not forget that black folk are more likely to be killed by a black defendant in a “stand your ground” case. That last point is something to marinate on if somewhere in your head you develop the notion that white folks are killing black folks and getting away with it.

I mean, I don’t think a white person who kills a black person who attempts to rob, car-jack, or simply kick his ass for being white isn’t justified in bussin’ a cap in a brotha’s ass. Hell, I’m black and I don’t care if you’re black, white, or purple: If you run up on me with the intent to do me harm — which almost always happens in the commission of a crime — I reserve the right to use deadly force to defend and protect myself from serious injury or death. And, I’m kinda glad that the law would look past my race, and instead focus on the circumstances leading to my defense of self.

Sure, Trayvon Martin’s parents are mourning the loss of their son, and as such, they feel compelled to do something to ensure that he did not die in vain. I can understand and empathize with them working to repeal Florida’s stand your ground law; however, at the end of the day, Trayvon was not killed by Florida’s stand your ground law. As a matter of fact, without the law on the books, I’m of the belief that that though unfortunate, he would still be dead. Not because he was committing a crime or being in the wrong place at the wrong time; but simply because George Zimmerman had a gun at the time of their confrontation. And unlike Marissa Alexander, Zimmerman didn’t fire a warning shot as an act of self-defense. Fortunately for Marissa, her actions could have, but didn’t lead to the death of another individual, given the presence of two children when she  pulled the trigger.

So who’s Marissa Alexander?

Look, there’s no argument from me on the history of racial bias when it comes to black folk and the judicial system. However, when it comes to justice, what matters more in my opinion, are the facts and circumstances surrounding the actions of a defendant, rather than the color of their skin, or if they’re male or female. At the end of the day, Marissa Alexander isn’t in jail for being black, any more than O.J. Simpson is. But, don’t tell that to Rep. Corine Brown (D-Fla) and the host of Alexander supporters who say otherwise; sadly, for them, facts do not matter.

The post So you say “Stand Your Ground” is Inherently Racist because Marissa Alexander is in Prison? appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.

I was met with the typical response from some commenters that sexual ambiguity is a deal breaker and how can one be sure they shared similar values if the other person is ‘like that’. People are hilarious sometimes, especially when I think of the amount of people who are married to what has recently been identified to me as a ‘beard’.

“Beard is a slang term describing a person who is used, knowingly or unknowingly, as a date, romantic partner (Boyfriend or Girlfriend), or spouse either to conceal infidelity or to conceal one’s sexual orientation.”

Now I don’t mean to be mean or anything, but I do find it peculiar that I am personally aware of waaaay more marriages where one partner is perceived as ‘‘questionable’, than I know of married couples where one spouse openly identified as homosexual, though married to a heterosexual.

I’m not saying that couples have to openly affirm their sexual orientation to society, but its not like people aren’t confused when these relationships are vigorously presented as simply a case of ‘boy meets girl’ when the boy in question has never, ever, ever been interested in girl until he decided to marry —->her.

Dating and marrying a thirty year old virgin doesn’t make a man special. Though some would love to think their un-tampered with unicorn’s lack of interest in mating with men before them, just meant they were waiting for ‘the one’ and he thinks she’s that “one”.

I’m not talking about the sexually conservative, or strict religious followers, I’m just talking about what I consider average peculiar behavior.

Arranged marriages and marriages of convenience are nothing new, but since we’re out here promoting marriage as a willing union and not as a business deal what is to be said about those using marriage as a front to hide their sexual orientation?

Everyone asks questions regarding the sexual orientation of one partner or the other; teachers and other family associates inquire as to the gender identity of the parent and at some point in time everyone begins to wonder what the REAL deal is.

While I have no problem with any couple (gay, straight or mixed) that marries for the sake of wanting to be together to take on life as a team what I do have a problem with are people who feel that it’s okay to front for the sake of saving face.

One partner marries someone whom they know could never love them the way they want but they are still willing to take a fraud of a relationship in order to feel special. One partner may sit idly by while the other partner continues to maintain their REAL romantic relationship with a same sex partner who they call their ‘best friend’. Yes, the bills are paid, the family piles into the car to attend church on Sundays and the portraits do look amazing but is this how you saw your marriage?

Surely this satisfies the requirement for some people’s definition of marriage but pardon me if I want more. Using a person as a front is selfish and cruel; allowing yourself to be used as a front shows desperation. Unfortunately, your willingness to be a tool won’t barter you the love you seek.

I’m not a witch doctor hunting down the mythical DL brothers because that facet of life is merely a half truth at best. But just as much as a man or woman has to be willing to lie and deceive others regarding his/her sexuality he/she must also have a partner who is willing to eat those lies and lick the bowl clean. If the wedding ring is more important than being able to look yourself and your spouse in the eye then the marriage isn’t worth the paper it’s written on.

You may say these unions are no one business but their own…I disagree.

I do know White couples, Asian couples and some Middle Eastern couples who are married to a homosexual partner in spite of the variation of sexual orientation. They have chosen to live their lives this way for their own reasons, but what I do see is that they care about each other and their relationship is authentic, as it should be.

With the shortage of Black male dating prospects out here I’m sure there are plenty of women who would be willing to look the other way and forgive past transgressions for a man who was willing to ‘get saved’ and change his body language, social circle and friends in order to give a respectable “go” of the marriage.

But how many of them would marry a plain old bi/gay male who was willing to do the same thing but for change his orientation and sexual identity……not many I bet.

When little potential future homosexual children seek examples of who they will be when they grow up it saddens me to know the amount of people out there who are willing to lie and let lie rather than those willing to accept their authentic selves and each other.

With no space to exist some will feel forced to fit into roles that require them to wear a mask and there will be those heterosexual people right there ready for them when they do.

The post Gay People DO Get Married: The Curious Case of the Beard – When “the Gays” Marry Straight People appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.

American women are offered 12 weeks of unpaid leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act, which exempts companies with fewer than 50 paid employees, but in 2011, only 11 percent of private sector workers and 17 percent of public workers reported that they had access to paid maternity leave through their employer. And for first-time mothers, only about half can take paid leave when they give birth.

At the same time that working women in the U.S. lack a benefit widely available across the globe, almost 50 percent of families had two working parents in 2010, and 26 percent of households were headed by single parents. Without guaranteed paid maternity leave, many of these working women face significant financial hardship by having to choose between their paycheck and their families.

Women are forced to put their careers and financial future at risk simply because they want to have children. During their pregnancy, they face being fired unfairly or not being able to properly care for themselves. They should not have to worry about making ends meet without paid maternity leave on top of that.

[...] Morris and Leeneeka Bell, who says she was fired by the Emergency Communications Center after her pregnancy left her on bed rest, announced their plans to file a lawsuit after the EEOC finding. Their attorney, Lisa Millican, says this is a clear-cut case of discrimination.

OK, so about that “being fired unfairly,” thingy:

(Reuters) – More than three decades after Congress passed a law trying to protect pregnant women in the workplace, discrimination is still widespread and needs to be combated with publicity and clearer guidelines, according to testimony Wednesday at a federal hearing.

The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission’s legal counsel, Peggy Mastroianni, said the agency had resolved 52,000 pregnancy cases since 2001, with $150.5 million paid out in damages.

Discrimination against pregnant women includes firing, forced leave without pay, being denied a place to pump breast milk and being barred from some work, witnesses told the five-member EEOC panel at a hearing on the issue.

Decades after the passage of the 1978 Pregnancy Discrimination Act, discrimination ranges from the shop floor to the executive suite, with sexual stereotyping a major factor. It is found in every state, but is more likely to hit women in low-income jobs, they said.

[...]The Pregnancy Discrimination Act forbids discrimination by employers based on pregnancy, including hiring, firing, pay, job assignments and promotions. Under the law, pregnancy is considered a temporarily disabling condition.

Yep, and you thought the so-called “war on women,” was just about birth control?

Two former Fulton County 911 operator trainees plan to sue the Georgia county, claiming they were fired for being pregnant.

One of the women secretly recorded a conversation she said she had with the director of the Emergency Communications Center, during which she asked for her job back after being fired.

Que'ana Morris & Leeneeka Bell said they are going to sue Fulton Co. after they say they were terminated for being pregnant.

In the recording obtained by ABC News, a person identified as department director Angela Barrett repeatedly refers to Que’ana Morris’ “situation” as the reason for her firing.

[...] Morris says in the two months before she was fired, she missed 16 days of work on doctor’s orders over complications with her pregnancy. She says she had permission to miss those days for medical reasons, and that it only became a problem after she was already fired.

I don’t know, but this seems like all types of wrong to me. What’s next, people getting fired for being a certain race? I know, I know, I know: something like that will never happen here in this country; but, this firing pregnant women thing is just ridiculous. But hey, maybe it’s a Georgia thing. According to another recent story, it’s okay for a cop to kick a pregnant women in the stomach.

The post Workplace Discrimination: Black Women Fired For Being Pregnant (VIDEO) appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.

The language on the ballot that NC citizens voted either ‘FOR’ or ‘AGAINST’ on May 8th, or earlier, stated:

Constitutional amendment to provide that marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized in this State.

It is important to note that prior to May 8, 2012, thirty states have included “same-sex marriage” bans in their constitutions. Legal scholars note that there are three types of language that these marriage bans maintain, and the rarest (and most broad) are language types such that Ohio used. North Carolina has now adopted such similar language, even though the consequences were proven in Ohio and the people of Ohio worked hard (and are still working) toward better legislation.

I am of the opinion that the amendment was framed this way before and during the vote in order to appeal to the emotions of the religious voters of the South. In fact, the people who thought it was about marriage and gays came out and expressed how much bigotry and privilege they maintained, quietly or not. However, the idea of marriage is less the focus in the language of the newly passed amendment, and the phrase the only domestic legal union is. Why? Because the courts have to interpret exactly what that means. Additionally, the newly passed “marriage amendment” is nearly identical to a tragedy that passed in Ohio, that opened the floodgates to consequences for more than just persons of the same sex/gender seeking marriage. In fact, in both Ohio and North Carolina, same sex marriage is already outlawed without the amendments.

Beyond further marginalizing the LGBTQ community, the marriage amendment has the potential to affect domestic violence victims. In Ohio, defense attorneys argued that unwed heterosexual couples did not meet the criteria for a “union”, however the court may decide to define it, and as such does not qualify for certain charges. Defense attorneys were also successful in overturning domestic violence convictions on this basis, and the courts were unclear on whether or not certain protections could be afforded to victims in the form of restraining orders. Also, the courts ruled inconsistently on these matters across the state, and so victims in different regions were not afforded the same protections. Eventually, the Ohio Supreme Court ruled that the constitutional ban did not affect domestic violence laws; however, it took three years for the circumstances to reach the court and for a decision to be made. During those three years, damage was done.

Even more unfortunate is the language in North Carolina’s newly passed amendment is more vague, and potentially more dangerous, than that belonging to Ohio. While there are some extremely progressive parts of North Carolina, there are also very small, rural communities that may have different understandings of the phrase “legal domestic union” and, much like Ohio, provide unequal protection of the law. This matters. THIS MATTERS. This matters because people in rural communities may not have access to many of the resources in the larger cities, and it Amendment One is an issue of classism in addition to anti-gay, religious bigotry.

Along those same lines, Amendment One has a great potential affect legislation where children of unwed parents are concerned. Custody and visitation laws may be affected with parties who have never had a “legal domestic union” as the courts see fit to interpret. Additionally, insurance benefits provided by either parent therein have the potential to be affected. This is incredibly important because, as of 2010, 72% of Black mothers were unwed. Does this mean that in every instance, the father is absent? Absolutely not. In one way or another, either through the courts or voluntarily, I would suggest that it has been my experience that many fathers are around in some form. I do not have a statistic and I will not speculate on a statistic; I am saying this to say that the passing of this amendment and a courts subsequent decision could limit this involvement, ergo harming children and Black families. Amendment One is harmful because, in addition to the anti-gay, religious bigotry and classism, it has the potential to be racially discriminatory and harmful. It harms single-parent families which, by extension, harms the Black community greatly.

Also, it should be noted that in few counties in North Carolina, unwed heterosexual couples are allowed domestic civil unions; this provides that partners can be on one another’s insurance benefits in addition to other benefits. These include assisting with medical decisions, adoptions, will and trusts, and other financial decisions. However, since marriage between one man and one woman is now the only domestic legal union, many people will be at a disadvantage.

We do not know what will happen. I think that is important to say; however, we do know the things that have the potential to happen. Also, the fact that marriage between one man and one woman is the only form of marriage acceptable in the state of North Carolina (and the other states who have amendments) is illustrative of the fact that the governments are using emotional push-buttons in order to further underlying agendas. Moreover, Constitutional Amendments aren’t like trying on new shoes and deciding that we do not like the fit. It takes time, energy, and resources to ‘undo’ this; there is no easy fix. Once this gets out of hand and negatively affects the citizens of North Carolina, the legislature cannot simply pass a statute to remedy it; a new amendment has to be passed and this will be extremely difficult.

Again, as someone from North Carolina who has been on the ground working for just about a year against the passing of this very scary amendment, I’m torn between sadness, disgust, and rage. While not entirely surprised that the amendment passed, I did think that it would be closer; only seven of North Carolina’s 100 counties voted successfully against it. A few weeks before the election, I got a 21-year-old brother registered to vote because he specifically wanted to vote against the amendment. The day of actual vote, I got into many arguments with many religious Black people who felt as though voting for Amendment One was a testament to their religious convictions. Though I attempted to explain, I was devastated at how unchanged their minds were; and they were mostly in their twenties!

I challenged all of my Facebook friends to give me a reason to vote FOR Amendment One that had nothing to do with religion and I got no responses. However, I went to high school with a guy who is apparently becoming a minister, and very much disagreed with my stance on the amendment. He, as a minister, has a child out of wedlock and maybe might just be a Black Republican (I’m not quite sure of the latter). And so, to appeal to his religious nature, I introduced him to Loving v. Virginia, where a married Black woman and white man were sentenced to a year in prison (suspended for 25 years of probation) for their interracial marriage in 1959 because the court found that:

Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And but for the interference with his arrangement there would be no cause for such marriages. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix.

Our government and constitutions should not be used as a sword, and it should not be used to prevent people from equal protection, rights, or benefits under the law. Our constitution is meant to give freedoms and not take them away. While in a way they’ve already begun, they are definitely coming for women and people of color next. Keep your religious opinions away from my constitution.

The post Amendment One: Wasn’t North Carolina The “Good” Carolina? appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.

Now, clearly to any rationally thinking mind, it is absurd to suggest anything as ridiculous as the aforementioned. But, don’t tell that to South Carolina State Senator Kevin Bryant, who argues that it is the unborn fetus conceived in an act of rape or incestuous relationship who is the real “victim,” and not its would-be-mother, Yes, I know, this is just re-damn-diculous.

This via The Columbia State:

The dispute focuses on the definition of “victim.” Supporters, like Bryant, say the unborn child is a victim who has rights that must be protected.

“We’re focusing on the rights and the liberty of an unborn child, and I can’t understand why the life of a child that’s a victim ought to be terminated,” Bryant said.

So what is an uninsured rape victim supposed to do? Well, she can pay-out-of-pocket for an abortion — something that isn’t likely given her financial status. Or, she can bare the shame and degradation of knowingly carrying and eventually going into labor and delivering the child of her attacker.

At that point, she can then make the decision to keep the child, or give it up for adoption. Now I’m not a woman, but this seems very wrong on so many levels. I could be wrong, but it seems too much like punishing a woman for 1) being a victim of rape, and 2) for being poor. According to the provisio — which is defined as a temporary one-year law — abortions would be paid for with tax payer dollars only in the event that the life of the mother is in danger.

The three exemptions in the state health plan — rape, incest or life of the mother — mirrors the policy of the federal government health plan, commonly referred to as the Hyde Amendment, named for former U.S. Rep. Henry Hyde of Illinois. That federal policy has been in place for more than 30 years.

Since 2006, state taxpayers have paid for 6 abortions. All of them were to save the life of the mother, according to the state Budget and Control Board.

Currently the state’s health insurance plan covers 417,000 individuals – no word on just how many of them are raped annually. However, this is something SC Republicans have been trying to pass for the last two years. Here’s to hoping that they remain unsuccessful this time around. But whether they are or not, it can never be said that women without access to affordable health care were not under attack like they always have by our slightly-more-conservative friends in the Republican party.

[FULL STORY HERE]

The post South Carolina Pushes Abortion Ban for Low-Income Victims of Rape & Incest appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.

I wonder about Anna Brown, a single mother who happens to be Black who died in a St. Louis jail cell after being arrested for seeking medical attention in a hospital emergency room. Above all, I wonder how something like this could’ve happened in America and go unnoticed, or fail to gain national attention in the past six months since her death in a jail cell. It was then it hit me: Anna Brown was a Black woman living on a very limited income, and she was homeless. It was after I read the following piece from Christine Byers at stltoday.com that it all made sense:

Anna Brown wasn’t leaving the emergency room quietly.

She yelled from a wheelchair at St. Mary’s Health Center security personnel and Richmond Heights police officers that her legs hurt so badly she couldn’t stand.

She had already been to two other hospitals that week in September, complaining of leg pain after spraining her ankle.

This time, she refused to leave.

A police officer arrested Brown for trespassing. He wheeled her out in handcuffs after a doctor said she was healthy enough to be locked up.

Brown was 29. A mother who had lost custody of two children. Homeless. On Medicaid. And, an autopsy later revealed, dying from blood clots that started in her legs, then lodged in her lungs.

She told officers she couldn’t get out of the police car, so they dragged her by her arms into the station. They left her lying on the concrete floor of a jail cell, moaning and struggling to breathe. Just 15 minutes later, a jail worker found her cold to the touch.

Officers suspected Brown was using drugs. Autopsy results showed she had no drugs in her system.

Six months later, family members still wonder how Brown’s sprained ankle led to her death in police custody, and whether anyone — including themselves — is to blame.

There seems to be no simple answer.

St. Mary’s officials say they did all they were supposed to do for Brown. Richmond Heights police said they trusted a doctor who said she was fit for jail.

Brown’s mother, Dorothy Davis, isn’t sure what to think.

“If the police killed my daughter, I want to know,” she said. “If the hospital is at fault, I want to know. I want to be able to tell her children why their mother isn’t here.”

Davis also faults the St. Louis County Family Court, which she said forced her into a heartbreaking dilemma after the state took away Brown’s children on a claim of neglect. Davis could take in her grandchildren or her daughter, a judge said, but not both.

“I’m mad at myself because if I hadn’t listened to the courts, she would still be here,” Davis said. “If she had been here at this house, she would be here today.”

[...] Anna Brown was one of 10 children. She graduated from Kirkwood High School. At 18, she had her first child, a boy. She had a daughter nine years later. Brown was raising them alone when a tornado destroyed her north St. Louis home on New Year’s Eve 2010. She moved to Berkeley.

Shortly after, she lost her job at a sandwich shop. Bills lapsed. The electricity was turned off. So was the gas. And the water.

Family members say Brown and her children appeared fine during visits at Davis’ home in Normandy.

They weren’t.

In April, a state Children’s Division representative found Brown’s toilet filled with feces. Burn marks scarred the floors and sinks where Brown had used small fires to stay warm. One refrigerator could not be opened. Insects and rotting food filled another, according to state reports given to the Post-Dispatch by Brown’s family.

Brown was not lucid and seemed confused as Berkeley police arrested her for parental neglect. The courts awarded legal custody of the kids to the Children’s Division. Davis could have physical custody, as long as Brown didn’t live with her.

Brown’s home was condemned. She ended up on the streets. She lived in four homeless shelters from May to September 2011.

Brown struggled with officials’ requirements for reuniting with her children. She passed two drug tests but balked at others. “She felt that she had passed them, so there was no point in doing them again,” Davis said.

A court-ordered psychological evaluation to determine whether Brown had cognitive, developmental, behavioral or mental illnesses came back inconclusive. So the courts ordered a psychiatric evaluation to determine whether Brown needed medication or a doctor’s treatment.

But Brown resisted, not understanding the difference between the two evaluations, according to her caseworker’s notes.

Still, she may have known something was wrong. She joined the St. Louis Empowerment Center, a drop-in center for the mentally ill.

“It was like a light bulb went on when she heard others tell their stories,” said Kevin Dean, a peer specialist at the center. “She was just starting to make progress.”

Brown’s witty comments often broke the ice during group meetings, said Warren Brown, another peer specialist and no relation to Anna.

Anna Brown one day said she hurt her ankle while walking near a ditch, Dean and Warren Brown recalled.

The last time they remember seeing her was in August 2011; she said she couldn’t walk up the stairs.

Brown told her caseworker on Sept. 14 that she had been admitted to St. Louis University Hospital for a sprained ankle.

Bills her mother received show Brown stayed at that hospital from Sept. 13-15 and underwent an EKG, some radiology services, lab work and cardiovascular services.

Dorothy Davis, holding 2-year-old granddaughter Isabel Price, talks about the death of her daughter during an interview with the St. Louis Post-Dispatch at her home in Normandy, Mo.

“She wasn’t very eager to go home, but we do all we can to take care of the whole patient, and we want to make sure that we do not push someone out the door as soon as she came here,” said SLU spokeswoman Laura Keller. She said there was no indication of a blood clot in Brown’s leg.

Krystle Brown said she saw her sister for the last time after she was discharged from SLU. She dropped Anna off on Market Street downtown, where Anna said she wanted to be.

Davis didn’t want her daughter out in the rain and ordered Krystle to bring her home — regardless of the court order. It was too late. Krystle couldn’t find her sister.

Four days later, Brown had her last supervised visit with her children. She was on crutches.

[...] State inspectors working for the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services — a federal agency that regulates hospitals — interviewed St. Mary’s staff and reviewed medical records after the Post-Dispatch asked about Brown’s case in January.

They found that on Sept. 20, Brown returned to SLU Hospital for knee and ankle pain. X-rays of her knees were negative and she was given a prescription for a painkiller.

She refused to leave. Hospital security called St. Louis police, who responded about 5 a.m. Brown told them she wanted to go to a better hospital but refused to go in an ambulance, police said.

She then wheeled herself next door to Cardinal Glennon Children’s Medical Center, where doctors found tenderness in her legs. They told her she was at a pediatric hospital. She said she wasn’t leaving unless someone took her to an adult hospital, according to the inspectors.

An ambulance then took her to St. Mary’s, inspectors found. She arrived at 11:45 a.m. Her left ankle was swollen. She was there for about seven hours, during which ultrasounds on both of her legs were negative for blood clots. A nurse said she saw her stand up. A social worker gave her a list of shelters and a phone number for transportation.

She returned eight hours later by ambulance complaining of abdominal pain only, inspectors said. She refused to sign discharge papers but was discharged at 7 a.m.

Richmond Heights Officer Jason Tharp was at St. Mary’s on another call about 10 a.m. when a security officer, Steve Schaffer, told him a woman was claiming she “did not receive adequate medical attention and did not have to leave.”

She was sitting in a wheelchair and told officers she was waiting for a ride. Tharp told her to wait outside or face arrest for trespassing.

“You can’t arrest me. I know my rights, I can’t even stand up!” she yelled, according to police.

Officer Scott Stebelman said he waited for about three hours for a doctor to examine Brown before taking her to jail. At 12:30 p.m., a doctor issued a “Fit for Confinement” report, according to the state inspectors.

The irony of the above story being written this week, is that the Supreme Court listened to arguments on the constitutionality of the individual mandate of the Affordable Care Act. Over the past few days, there have been many people in Washinton DC protesting outside of those hearings either in support of or against the current law now touted as “Obamacare”. I’ve even heard it said that a repeal of Obamacare would negatively impact the lives of women across the country. Even so, I wonder just how many people protesting are aware of Anna Brown’s story, and the countless stories of women like her? It’s one thing to rightfully fight for justice for for Trayvon Martin; and, in doing so taking the opportunity to speak out against the racial profiling of Black men in America.

However, with the fastest growing prison population in the last decade or so being women, I believe there is room for a conversation about Anna Brown and the numerous stories of struggling poor Black women like her. Please believe, many of them are dying in prison without being able to receive the proper medical attention. And like Anna, many of them can be diagnosed as mental patients; but, nobody seems to care about them. But this is to be expected when gender and race intersests.

It’s not right, and it’s not acceptable.

The post What Does Trayvon Martin and Anna Brown Have in Common, Besides Being Black and Dead? appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.

Society likes to paint pictures of families and their dynamics as Norman Rockwell masterpieces.  Works of art that fit neatly into what people think or want families to be. This kind of thinking however, precludes the conversation regarding the prevalence of family dysfunction.

It is supposedly an ugly word – those family members that are bold enough to try to lay claim to some family issue are usually branded as trouble makers, ungrateful, misanthropes that should “try harder” at making their family dynamic work. This is due in part to people’s belief that all families are supposed to be perfect or damn near close to it.

Shaquan Duley's Now Deceased Children

The belief that every woman who gives birth to a child will make an ideal mother is another fallacy that – while mountains of evidence to the contrary exist, people refuse to accept. The thousands of babies born addicted to crack, neglected, and subjected to all manners of child abuse at the hands of family members, including their own mothers belies that theory of mandatory maternal instincts. There needs to be a dialog that allows for people   who do not have the family dynamic portrayed on Hallmark movie of the week or Lifetime – to speak without fear of reprisals or being branded negatively. There needs to be an understanding that becomes more widespread that recognizes that not all human beings are automatically born with empathy and a capacity to care in a positive way for others.  There needs to be an understanding that the experiences that happen in one’s life can create issues that preclude people from acting in ways that society can relate to and or understand.

Suffering in silence is what many members of dysfunctional family units are relegated to.  Some lucky souls might find there way into therapy where they can work those issues out, but so many more are forced to internalize and or self medicate in an attempt to cope with highly dysfunctional family members from mothers, fathers siblings, etc.  No one but the Duley family knows what issues the family has been facing and dealing with up to now. I would think that given the current situation with Shaquan, they would trade all the events of the last few years for some serious time spent in family counseling.

As to Shaquan herself, I do not personally know her. My heart as many others out there, felt pain at the loss of two beautiful children.  To hear her today get up  in court and plead guilty to the murder of her own two children weighs heavy on my heart.  In a horrible sense of time delay it would seem now, months later, she realizes the mistake that she made. There is nothing a court of law can do in the way of administering justice in this case. There  will not be any on this side of life.  No sentence can bring those boys back. No  punishment can equal the realization of knowing that you killed your own children  and tried to cover it up.

Some things have no reason or why and are inexplicable. Knee jerk reactions well up into emotional responses that are quick to condemn as evil that which defies our range of understanding.  Just because something defies one’s understanding, does not make it or in this case Shaquan Duley evil.

Lean not on your own understanding…..

The post Shaquan Duley, Mistakes, and Dysfunctional Families appeared first on THE INTERSECTION | MADNESS & REALITY.